Trying not to take credit...

So, to redeem myself from my last post I want to write about an amazing turn of events that also, as it happens, coincides with Easter.

A few months ago, my sister Kelley and I were talking about things we wanted. She stated that she really wanted to find her husband, Greg's mother. I probably have my details mixed up but I believe they had been apart for over 20 years. This could be false data but its somewhere in that neighborhood. I told Kelley, with a false sense of bravado, that with a few keystrokes and $10.00 we could probably have her phone number in minutes. So, I googled the name and put in a few other details ...and up popped a name, and an address, and a phone number, and her list of relatives...and Greg was listed. We both sat with that bewildered sense of "Wow! Guess what we've done!!" I could feel that awe emanating across the entire gap from TX to KS. I think we both had chills. Kelley hung up with me, called Greg and asked a few questions about other relatives that were listed to narrow down that yes, this was in fact his mom...and it was! Kelley, being her beautiful, impulsive self, couldn't wait to call her. She wanted her to know how wonderful her son is, what an amazing dad he is to her boys and what a great man he had become...and yes probably that she is a kick-ass catch for him as well!

And she called her.

I probably wouldn't have been as brave. I would have over-analyzed, talked myself into and out of calling her. I would have wondered if Greg would have hurt feelings when he talked to her, anger, sadness or worse indifference. That comes from all of the mixed up feelings from our own childhood. My sisters, and brothers and I all grew up apart, yet still feel very close. We all still live apart but truly we all know how monumentally important we are to each other. I probably would have worried what his mom would have to say. I would be afraid that she would have anger or resentment or worse indifference. I think that would have been the hardest thing for me. Worrying that someone would be rejecting someone that is so important to me. But Kelley wasn't. She got to talk to her mother in law, Greg got to talk to his mom. No anger, judgment, or indifference. Just gratitude at finding each other. Graciousness that Kelley reached out and did something neither of them had been able to do.

After a few weeks of phone calls their new found family member was coming to stay with them. In that short time Kelley gained a mother-in-law and the boys gained a G.G. (Grandma from Greg) She is there right now, with my beautiful nephews, becoming part of their life, of my sister's life and becoming a tangible part of Greg's life again. As his mother she was always part of his life. I'm sure like any of us, there is always that point in the day when his parents cross his mind. But its different when you have the ability to pick up the phone and talk to them. Even if you don't pick up the phone, you know you can. For Greg's mom, she gets to see that they are a true family. Greg became part of our family instantly. We were so grateful that Kelley had someone that would love her unconditionally and better than that would love the boys unconditionally. They are proof that despite our pasts or maybe because of them we all have the ability to move on and create a family by being a family.

So this Easter, while many of will be marvelling at the candy, or the flowers, or the fact that Spring is here and its even starting to look like it. And despite the normal sibling hassling that my sister and I do, I will stop giving her grief that I made it all happen (I keep waiting for my invitation to be on Oprah because I made it all come true!) I will be thankful for knowing that a mother's love is in many forms, never dies, and can be a bond from one mom to another even if they aren't even related.